Uncharted

School has been going on for about a week and a half now, and I can only pray it does not get difficult. I am super lucky that my classes seem to be much easier this semester, but I am afraid it will suddenly become monstrous again.

Well, I am excited about all my classes, millworking shop is my favorite (that's the one where I actually make things). Anyway, I am just killing a little time (can't you hear it screaming at me? Horrible waste right now) and thought I would post a bit on the blog I'll probably forget about in a few months.

I have realized how much I truly don't know. I mean, there is so much! I feel like I've just been faking my carpentry skill all this time, and now I get to learn the right way to do things. Not that I'll let that dictate how I will always do something. I'll mix and match techniques and see how I like it.

But I'm not entirely like a fish out of water. I'm getting the key, learning, and now I'll make the map. Until I get there I guess I'm uncharted.

Uncharted - Sara Bareilles

No words, my tears won't make any room for more
And it don't hurt like anything I've ever felt before
this is no broken heart, no familiar scars
This territory goes uncharted...

Just me, in a room sunk down in a house in a town and I
Don't breathe, no I never meant to let it get away from me
No I've too much to hold, everybody has to get their hands on gold
And I want uncharted
Stuck under the ceiling I made, I can't help but feeling

I'm going down, follow if you want I won't hang around
Like you'll show me where to go
I'm already out of foolproof ideas so don't ask me how
To get started, it's all uncharted

La la la-a-a-a Oh-h-h

Each day, countin' up the minutes til I get alone, 'cause I can't stay
In the middle of it all, it's nobody's fault, but I'm
So low I never knew how much I didn't know
Oh, everything is uncharted
I know I'm going nowhere, when I only sit and stare like


I'm going down, follow if you want I won't hang around
Like you'll show me where to go
I'm already out of foolproof ideas so don't ask me how
To get started, it's all uncharted

Jump start my kaleidascope heart,
love to watch the colors fade
they may not make sense
but they sure as hell made me

I won't go as a passenger, no
Waiting for the road to be laid
Though I may be going  down
I'm taking flame over burning out

Compare where you are to where you want to be, and you'll get nowhere


I'm going down, follow if you want I won't hang around
Like you'll show me where to go
I'm already out of foolproof ideas so don't ask me how
To get started, it's all uncharted


Oh, I'm going down, follow if you want I won't hang around
Like you'll show me where to go
I'm already out of foolproof ideas so don't ask me how
To get started, it's all uncharted

Five More Minutes

Do you ever find yourself being too optimistic with your time and capabilities? Normally, I account for my over-optimism fairly well. I plan for my optimum, and add a little cushion room around that. Unfortunately I've missed the mark quite a bit recently. Either that or I'm just exerting absolute minimal effort lately.

I worked for 14 hours yesterday. Now, in a normal day there are 24 hours, and in a normal work day around 8 (though in my case it's supposed to be 6-7). With 14 hours of work, and two 1-hour breaks, that leaves 8 hours for travel to and fro, as well as breakfast, dishes, and sleep. I skipped the former 2 in favor of the latter, but even so there was time used in preparation for going to work and also getting ready for bed. Plus the good hour or more I was kept awake by horrendous mosquito bites (currently I think I have about 7).

All in all I was awake and mostly active for about 18 hours yesterday and received 6 hours of sleep.

I am dead tired. I don't function properly without at least 7 hours of restful sleep, and then when I got up this morning I went back in to the fray! I went in for another extra long work day. Fortunately, I only stayed 8 1/2 hours this time. I need some rest if I'm going to work for 12 more hours tomorrow. I have until 7 o'clock tomorrow night to finish the set.

At any rate, the point is I'm tired. I am absolutely beat, and the only thing I think that might help is spending the remainder of my day someplace other than work or my apartment. I want to sleep, but I need a different form of rest. I need removal. If I don't do something different tonight I might just crack.

Five More Minutes - Meaghan Smith
Lyrics:
I'm not tired in the least
Five more minutes, please
The sun hasn't set
It's painting the west
Picture pretty

Hints of lilac light
But not a star in sight
Last call for kick the can
Please, just once again
Before I come inside

Don't wanna go to bed
Don't wanna close my eyes
Don't wanna rest my head
And end this summer night

Don't wanna go to bed
And end this summer night

Fireflies glow for us
The cricket's orchestra
The night is awake
Please don't make me
Go to sleep
I'm not tired in the least
Five more minutes please
I'm not tired in the least
Five more minutes please

Rivers and Roads

This one goes out to my family. I adore them, and cannot wait to see them again! I will thankfully get to see them tomorrow night after 2 days of driving, but it just won't come soon enough! And I won't even be there very long! I am tempted to plan a 4 day weekend at the end of the summer to drive up and get a couple more days with them. Heck, if I had company we might even be able to drive up during the night and get even a few more hours, but that's not really a good idea. Doesn't mean I don't want to though.

Anyway, since last Friday I have been doing a lot of traveling. I went on a road trip with my roommate to Rexburg, Idaho for Independence day weekend and spent it with her family. We went to Idaho Falls a couple times while we were there, and now I get to do another 14 hours of driving. Oh goody. But it won't be so bad really - I'll spend the night in a hotel so I"ll probably go swimming before bed, maybe use the exercise room to get me in shape for my 5k on Saturday.

Anyway, I just can't show my enthusiasm enough to get there!

Rivers and Roads - The Head and the Heart

Philosphia

I was reading in the Ensign magazine this morning, a rather long article about the family and it's importance in society and in the Church. As I read I found a section on tolerance.
Now, it seems to me (and obviously to the author of the article) that the definition of tolerance has changed recently. It used to be a civil respect of other persons for their belief, race, or other such thing. Now it seems that it is entirely blurring the lines of right and wrong, that being tolerant means that you must not only accept of another's belief/disbelief/sexuality/opinions/arguments/etc, but you must also defend them, fight for them, even if they are not your own. Now, I am a tolerant person. I believe that if you want to believe something, go right ahead. Just let me believe what I want as well. I belong to what used to be the majority and in many places still is - Caucasian, christian, heterosexual, you get it. But that doesn't mean I look down on anyone who is otherwise.

As I read the article in question, something written stuck out to me. "An extreme definition of tolerance is now widespread that implicitly or explicitly endorses the right of every person to choose their own morality, even their own 'truth,' as though morality and truth were matters of personal preference."

This reminded me of a song I know and love by an Irish band known as The Guggenheim Grotto. I remember showing this song to my brother Paul after he got back from his LDS mission, and he pointed out to me how it reminded him of exactly what I am talking about now. The lyric goes like this "But in time a thought comes tugging on the sleeve edge of our minds/Perhaps no perfect way exists at all, just many different kinds/Oh but if it's just a thing of taste then everything unwinds/For without an absolute how can the absolute define/A work of art"

How can we define what is good and true when we keep blurring the lines and making concessions to all and sundry who are demanding things that are not necessarily their right?

What's wrong with having opinions that Differ? That doesn't mean we have to change the world to fit them. It just means we differ in opinion. In the words of my brother Ben (I have no idea where he came up with this), we have the right to be offended. It's okay to think differently, it's good even! So go on and be different, but that doesn't mean you have to try and change my opinion to fit yours inside .It doesn't work that way.

Lyrics - Philosophia by The Guggenheim Grotto

When we're young we set our hearts upon some beautiful idea
Maybe something from a holy book or French philosophia
Upon the thoughts of better men than us we swear by and decree a
Perfect way to end the war of ways, the only way to be a

Work of art Oh to be a work of art

But in time a thought comes tugging on the sleeve edge of our minds
Perhaps no perfect way exists at all, just many different kinds
Oh but if it's just a thing of taste then everything unwinds
For without an absolute how can the absolute define

A work of art Oh to be a work of art

When we're young we set our hearts upon some beautiful idea
Maybe something from a holy book or French philosphia

Another Day

So you know, The title on my posts are either the song I am listening to right now, or a song that I believe fits my thoughts on said post. Also, I will hide little references to songs inside my posts.

And now for something COMPLETELY different...

Ambiguous. It's a great word.

In my opinion everything is a little ambiguous, mostly because everyone has different perceptions. I was talking with one of my roommates earlier about what should she do in a particular 'what if' situation regarding dating. This in itself is a little perilous as I don't really have the best track record with dating (but then, who does?). Anyway, she told me about her what if situation(s) in such a way that her different options sounded absolutely resolute in their interpretation. The only thing I could think during this is "that's not necessarily how it will be interpreted." For example, if a guy asked me out, the only think I know for sure is that he asked me out. I don't know what he's thinking at all. Is he interested? Did he just need a date this weekend? I have no idea. And what of my response? If I say yes, does that say I am interested? If I say no because I'm busy does that denote disinterest? If I say "no, but lets do something another time" does that say I am very interested? Not really! I may be having an off day and be brusque in me response even if I am interested. Or perhaps it's the flips side. And really, at that early stage, I shant have likely formulated my own opinions strongly enough to where one date would mean all that much anyway. You can't deduce other people opinions based on so little information! What's the scientific rule? Something about needing a certain amount of data to make an accurate conclusion . . .

In all this convoluted storytelling (and I do have a bad habit of making the shortest story incredibly drawn-out)  my conviction is that it doesn't matter what words you use exactly when you say something, nor does it matter when you do something that might possibly be interpreted incorrectly. Chances are it will. And really, if you have to weigh all of the possible interpretations before saying something, you'll never say anything, which is even more ambiguous in meaning.

So what if someone takes something little the wrong way? It was bound to happen eventually, and life is full of misinterpretation; that's what makes it so interesting. Can you imagine a world of perfect communication? I think that'd be kind of boring, don't you?


Another Day - Pomplamoose
Lyrics:

Another day shows it's face
I'm half awake half in space
And if you told me I looked beautiful well that would just be in poor taste

Another hour flying by
I've yet to shower yet to dry
And if you told me I was wonderful I probably would wonder why

I am yours, you are mine
I am yours, you are mine, so it's alright

Another plate in the sink
We're half the same half distinct
And if you told me I was perfect I'd assume you had too much to drink

I am yours, you are mine
I am yours, you are mine, so it's alright

Another day fades away
You're half asleep half in space
And if you told me we were dreaming I would pinch you to prove we're awake
Yeah, if you told me we were dreaming I would pinch you to prove we're awake
If you told me we were dreaming I would pinch you to prove we're awake
Yeah, if you told me we were dreaming I would pinch you to prove we're awake

At Last

I finally gave in and started a blog. I've been thinking about it for a while, and after having struggled with finding a suitable enough title, I have done it. Whoopee. Now we'll see if I have anything to say that I feel like I can post freely on the internet. Most of it, I'm sure, will have to do with some of the following: carpentry, theatre, music, love, and observations on behavior. Also, most posts will be very short.

In the end of all of this, just know that I'm just trying to do my best at whatever, and I ain't misbehavin'.